I love Facebook. I really do. I know there are criticisms:

I get it. It is a time suck and I can’t remember the last time I wrote a handwritten note to someone (though I still love doing that).

But I actually like knowing what people are eating for dinner and the stupid little bumper sticker sayings, memes, often make me think.

I promise I am actually living my life and with six little ones and a husband who craves my constant attention, I assure you I get more face time than any single person needs in a lifetime.

And Facebook still makes me happy.

Facebook lets me efficiently stay in touch and up to date with people I care about (regardless of how far away they may physically be), it allows me to collect varied thoughts and opinions from a group more diverse than I would otherwise be able to connect with daily, and it allows me to have a voice about every little thing I am thinking. If you know me, you know how important this last one is for me. I find it mildly painful to keep my thoughts to myself.

I know not everyone is as live-out-loud as I am and that most people value this thing they like to call privacy – but I have no need to keep anything to myself and Facebook is a benign way for me be a kind of life exhibitionist. As it turns out, it is not as important for people to hear what I am saying as it is for me to simply say it. This works for me and my exhibitionist ways, and it also works for the voyeurs and the introverts. I know lots of people who think deeply and have sharp, thoughtful observations and humor, but could never imagine jumping into a conversation and sharing them. Facebook is perfect for them. They use this medium to let their brilliance show without having to have face time, which actually does not work for everyone, The idea of face time commentary for some is enough to make their armpits turn into fountains and their stomachs feel like they have eaten at Taco Bell [Editor’s note: Mmmmm. Taco Bell]. Being a loud and energetic talker means I often miss the softer spoken among us – status updates allow me to be a good listener and I am simply giddy about the Facebook opportunity to get into the heads of these more gentle voices. Happy. Juicy.

There is another aspect of Facebook, the good book, that makes us better people. When we respond in a written manner we do so mindfully. Even if we quickly type the first thing that pops into our head, we have the moment to reread before clicking send, the moment to think of those on our friend list and think about being respectful to them – a moment of deliberate communication. There is a beauty in taking our time that is not always found when we are speak to one another. This is especially important with heavy topics – gun control, gay marriage, abortion, the elections, food politics – really in most things presenting a thoughtful, considerate response is a way to open minds, promote empathy, and just understand one another a bit more. There is a meme (remember that word from above?) that reads: “Oh, your post on Facebook totally changed my mind! – said no one, ever” –  DISLIKE. Simply not true. The good book has made me think and provided important information about my friends I otherwise may never have received.

The Book is about connecting, and I think that is a good thing. When we see posts about toys we had as kids, or funny quips about things we all experience we smile and think of the poster fondly. When there is tragedy we mourn or cry out in anger together – or maybe just cry together in a virtual sharing circle. I just can’t buy into the notion that the Good Book is estranging us from one another – I think the opposite is true. It confirms we are not alone.

As I write this I am waiting for a plane and I have just learned of the death of my favorite aunt. I loved this woman and she helped raise me. I am all alone in an airport and I really want a hug. Luckily, I stop just short of crazy long enough to ask for a hug from a stranger. I get one. So I have done the next best thing. I posted on Facebook. I said she died and I shared my sweet memories of her. Hugs came flowing in the form of comments from friends who knew her and mourn her and others who have never met her and maybe barely know me, but grieve for me as they have come to know me through my posts, or maybe just comment because we all know some form of grief and we all know that a reach out feels good.  Either way – I feel better.

Some people resent Facebook. They say it is a false representation of who we are – that on Facebook we put our best foot forward and create an image of who we want to be and not who we really are. But…. so what? Really – so what? I would love for people to walk the talk and live in the light of all the inspirational quotes they post, but if the closest they get is outlining who they want to be, I will take it! Enough practice at putting your best foot forward and expressing your ideal self just may make you start to believe in your posts and maybe even act on them. If you can’t walk the talk, at least keep talking – or posting, practicing and attracting the positive. Better than never thinking about it.

Although my husband/editor finds it frustrating at best when I give him only part of my attention when my head is behind my screen and I am catching up with my people – I think the Good Book does more good than harm. It lets us witness each other’s lives, it lets us know each other’s minds, and it lets us live in one another’s hearts. And – let’s be honest, it gives us something to do in the bathroom.